Goodbye my lover, Goodbye my friend
by Leanne-Jones
Summary: Contains spoilers from 3x09. I think everyone is really sad about last nights episode losing a character is always hard. I may carry on with the story as its mostly going to be about Andy with probably some Sam and seeing the promo for 3x10 it gives me so ideas to write with. I'm still new to fanfiction so please be nice. Rating may change.
1. Chapter 1

Goodbye my lover, Goodbye my friend

**I think everyone is feeling the pain of losing a much loved character last night. Even though I knew it was a possibility I still ended up shedding tears watching the episode. R.I.P Jerry.**

**While listening to the James Blunt song Goodbye my lover it reminded me of Rookie Blue so I thought I would write down some ideas. I hope you enjoy since I'm every new to Fanfiction. I might carry on with the story I have some ideas that just need to be written into words.**

Chapter 1:

Sometimes the hardest things in life come when you least expect it. Staring out of the window in Traci's bedroom Andy wished she could take some of the pain away that her best friend was feeling.

The sobs had died off and heavy breathing was heard in the room meaning Traci had finally fallen asleep. Glancing back to the bed tears gathered in Andy's eyes remembering the look when she broke the news to her, something she never would wish on anybody. They had a future ahead of them time to love, argue and plan a future together now that was taken away from them in a day.

Andy crawled back into her side of the bed facing Traci's back wrapping her arms around her. She couldn't take away her pain but she would provide the little bit of comfort she could in her friend's time of need.

Tomorrow would come sooner than they think for both of them the reality setting in the harder challenges would then begin like eating, sleeping and carrying on living without him here.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2:

Sun rays streamed through the curtains walking Andy up. Turning over she noticed Traci was already awake just lying there staring at her engagement ring, a ring which was soon going to be joined with another single band.

Silence broke with the shaking and the cries of pain from person next to Andy. Pulling Traci into her arms she just hugged her knowing no words would cover the situation that had occurred.

'Mummy?' Leo whispered hiding behind the door, making both Andy and Traci sit up.

'Come here Leo' Traci responded her voice breaking towards the end.

Leo ran over to be enclosed in Traci arms we she hugged him tightly as if he too would disappear or be taken from her.

Andy crept out the door leaving the mother and son to grieve in peace.

Wandering over to the kitchen she started making breakfast knowing Traci would not touch her food but Leo still needed to eat and keep some semblance of a routine. As she gathered the fruit and chopping board her hands moved some paper making it fall to the floor. Quickly placing it back where she found it the words at the top caught her eye Bailey's Real estate both Jerry and Traci had discussed planning on moving to a new house after they got married but seeing the pieces of paper made it all real.

How do you help you best friend get over the worst kind of heartbreak? Sure she had experienced some types of heartbreak but never from losing the person you love. If it had been Sam in Jerry's place she would be just like Traci barely holding onto what's left of life.

Grabbing the cereal and fresh fruit she prepared, she carefully walked back to the bedroom pausing to knock on the door before she entered.

Seeing both Leo and Traci lying facing each other in bed Andy placed the food down in front of Leo sharing a look of thanks from Traci.

Before climbing back in next to Leo, Andy's phone started ringing causing her to stumble over to the dresser she left it on. Thinking it was Sam who she hadn't talked to since the night before she blurted out a 'are you okay?' before realising it wasn't Sam it was the hospital calling back after finding something on her blood results.


	3. Chapter 3

**I wasn't actually sure if I was going to go in this direction with the story but after thinking about it I thought yes I would go with my original idea. It's nice to know there are people out there reading this. I hope you enjoy this short chapter. R.I.P Jerry. **

Chapter 3:

'Are you okay?' Andy asked expecting Sam to answer in his gruff voice.

'I'm sorry is this Andy McNally?' a voice she didn't recognize responded.

'Erm yes this is she' Andy answered back worried something had happened to Sam.

'This is Toronto Hospital I'm calling about your blood results which were taken yesterday' the lady on the other end spoke.

Immediately Andy started fearing the worst had the attacker injected with something else than what the first thought. Maybe she was sick that would be even worse now was not the time to be ill Traci, Leo and Sam needed her as well as her extended family at the 15th division.

'Miss McNally? Are you still there?' the lady voice spoke again pulling Andy out of her rapidly forming thoughts.

'Yes I'm still here, is anything wrong?' Andy said.

'No nothing's wrong' the women chuckled. 'Your blood test showed the tranquilizer used but also high levels of hCG.'

'What's hCG?' Andy questioned.

'Well hCG is a hormone usually found in pregnant women. Miss McNally I'm calling to tell you, you're pregnant' the lady answered.

The phone clattered to the floor the women worried voice still speaking though. Pregnant the words echoed in her head. No that not was not possible she and Sam had always been safe, there was that one time okay maybe two times but how could she possibly be PREGNANT!

'Urgh stupid pill with only 98% chance' Andy mumbled to herself picking the phone off the floor and assuring the lady she was okay just in shock then shortly saying goodbye with the promise to see her own doctor soon.

Its not that she didn't want a baby a baby with Sam would be great in the future, key word being future. Now just didn't seem like the time everyone was grieving, Sam was grieving.

Oh god Sam! How was she meant to tell him he hardly spoke to her last night at the hospital? He just kept giving her these sad looks which looked like there was something else behind them.

She couldn't worry about this now though Traci needed her there for her right now. Tomorrow would be the funeral and after both she and Traci would have to return to work tomorrow, Traci with Jerry now gone and Andy carrying a secret.


	4. Chapter 4

**I found it really hard writing this chapter having not seen 3x10 I took my ideas for writing from the promos and some music. Thanks for the follows and reviews I've got. I'll try to update as soon as possible. R.I.P Jerry. I think this week's episode is going to also be another sad one. I really hope it doesn't happen but I have a feeling Sam and Andy will break up, which is sad since I have shipped them from the start but if they do I don't think it will be for long. Well hopefully it won't be for long. **

Chapter 4:

Rain poured from the sky as if understanding the significance of the day. Losing an officer was always hard, the 15th division was like a family everyone had each other's backs and cared about what happened to them.

The officers stood in official uniform including gloves and hats around the casket that held a friend.

Andy held on to Traci's hand as the vicar began talking about the type of person Jerry was. One hand of Traci's held onto Andy's while the other one rested on the box in front of her that contained the man she loved.

This wasn't the type of occasion either Andy or Traci had imagined planning for, one Traci would be dressed in white instead of the traditional officers uniform for the burial of a fallen comrade and the flowers would not be lilies instead something more joyful for the wedding that was to be held in Dominican Republic.

The grip on Andy's hand tightened as the casket gradually got lowered while there colleagues and friends lowered their heads in respect.

Guns rang out breaking the silence of the graveyard. Tears fell from the corners of Andy's eye making her quickly wipe them away as they fell down her face. Today she had to be strong for Traci who walls she could see were gradually breaking down.

The lower the casket got the more Traci broke down before she fell to her knees bringing Andy down with her.

Andy turned her head to meet Sam eyes only to see the shield that she had been lowering in the time when they had been together up in full force. As he meet her eyes he gave her a look she couldn't quite decipher it was between disappointment, pain and anger something Andy didn't like or understand where it was coming from. She knew he was grieving as was everyone else but while she was supporting Traci he just seemed to be pushing her away.

He then took his hat off and began walking in the other direction out of the graveyard to his truck. Part of her was torn between staying with her friend or going after Sam who was becoming smaller in the distance with every step he took.

It seemed as though he made the decision without her, he didn't want her around him and that hurt. Andy knew she had to talk to him he was cutting her out and she didn't know why but it wasn't just about them anymore, it was about the baby she just found out she was carrying.

So she stayed crouching beside Traci trying to say comforting words. Having then being joined by Dov on her side and Chris and Oliver on Traci's other side.

'Traci we can stay here all day if you want' Andy spoke squeezing Traci's hand. 'There's no rush, we will stay right here with you.'

Traci looked at Andy her eyes red and bloodshot from the amount of crying she had done since Jerry had been gone. Nodding her head Andy stood up helping Traci from the ground, with one last look Traci through a rose on top of the coffin before turning away with her friend's arms around her shoulders.

Both Traci and Andy knew that they would come back here again but now it was time to gather at the penny for the wake.

Entering the penny they were met by sympathetic gazes and condolences as people came up to Traci.

Andy spotted Sam at his usual table nursing a scotch still not bothering to look at Andy.

Sending a signal to the bartender a row of shots were lined up at the bar next to a photo of Jerry in a circle of tea lights.

Coldplay started playing over the stereo in the corner, Traci had mentioned it was his favourite band and together Andy and she had put it together as a way to say goodbye.

Grabbing the shot at the bottom of the row which she knew was filled with water instead of vodka she sent a wink to the bartender in thanks of setting this up for her.

Andy was nowhere near ready to have her friends question her about while she was not drinking and she hadn't even talked to Sam yet so for now deception was the best way.

Sitting at the rookie's table Andy saw Sam head out the main door making the choice to follow him out and talk.

Quickly telling Traci where she was going Andy grabbed her bag and followed Sam to the parking lot before he had the chance to drive away again.

Earlier she had run to the drug store and brought a pregnancy test trying to make the situation more real, when she read the little pink plus on it there was no way of denying the truth she was pregnant. Now she was carrying the test in her bag in the hopes she would get to talk to Sam after the funeral.

'Sam' Andy gently called causing him to stop but not turn around.

**Okay so I tried making this chapter a bit longer. There might be some mistakes in bits of my fanfiction but I really write to just share ideas. I know I love reading Rookie Blue fanfiction and I hope the people that read this enjoy where the story is going.**


	5. Chapter 5

**New chapter: hope you enjoy :-)**

Chapter 5:

'_Sam' Andy gently called causing him to stop but not turn around. _

It was still raining outside making Andy's hair stick to her face and her clothes start to cling to her body. None of that mattered though Sam still wasn't responding to her sound of her voice.

Walking up to where he was standing and laying a hand on his shoulder she saw his visible flinch. Where had this come from? even before they were together he never had a problem with her touch in fact he usually would guide he by placing a hand on her back in a reassuring manner.

'Sam' Andy tried again.

Stepping in front of him she saw his eyes were closed, his jaw stiff as if he was trying to control his emotions.

'Sam? What's going on?' questioned Andy.

His eyes shot open making Andy gasp as hurt and anger filled them.

'Andy go back inside' Sam spoke in a deadly calm voice.

'What? Why? We need to talk Sam? Andy stuttered shocked.

'Andy go back, I don't want to talk to you right now' Sam spoke using the same voice.

'What do you mean you don't want to talk to me right now?' Andy's voice suddenly started getting louder her anger becoming clear.

'Sam you have barely looked at me spoke to me or even acknowledged my existence since last night' Andy shouted.

'I know you're grieving just don't push me away' Andy said lowering her voice.

Suddenly Sam calm gaze snapped. 'Oh course I'm grieving Andy!' Sam yelled making Andy step back slightly. She knew he would never hurt her but at the moment she couldn't get a read on his emotions.

'My best friend just died! He was lying on the floor bleeding to death because I choose to go with you instead of following what Jerry wanted us to do' Sam yelled.

'Are you blaming me for Jerry?' Andy replied unbelieving that Sam was doing this.

'I listened to a rookie instead of my own gut'

'A rookie who you taught to trust her gut, I believed that the bartender was the one that took Gail. I know I was wrong but blaming this on me is not going to bring him back.'

'No nothing is going to bring him back' Sam spat. Then whispering making Andy strain to hear it he added 'I can't be a cop and be with you.'

Andy's eyes filled with tears, Sam was doing what she asked him to never do, he was walking out the door without fighting.

Sam once said that all she wanted was to be a police officer and all he wanted was her but now the roles had been reversed. Sam loved being a police officer, he became one to protect his sister and Andy knew he wasn't going to give it up.

Turning around facing out to the road Andy croaked 'I guess there's nothing else to say then.'

Fighting back the tears she began walking out the car park leaving Sam still standing there. She wasn't going to cry in front of him, although going back to her apartment was the last thing she wanted to do she couldn't let Traci see her right now. Traci need strong support not a friend crying from a broken heart.

Neither Andy nor Sam noticed the pregnancy test poking out of Andy's bag when they were talking. Placing her hand on her stomach the tears now started flowing like they would never stop.

Tomorrow work was going to be that much harder not only had she lost a friend and had her best friend grieving she now lost the man she loved. Reaching her apartment a shudder ran through her, this was the first time Andy had entered the apartment since the attack and Gail's abduction. Ignoring the lamp still knock on the floor Andy removed her boots and climbed into bed fully clothed. Curling up into a ball the sobbing increased.

Part of her hoped Sam would have come after her even though he had hurt her.

Sam showed no sign of chasing after her though. It was now just her and the baby.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

Secrets were meant to be broken. That's what Sam had once said to Andy before she corrected the expression. No really promises were meant to be broken and that's exactly what Sam did. He broke his promise.

Surviving on less than two hours sleep after crying herself to sleep and barely touching her breakfast before making her way to the station was bad for her. Andy knew that. It wasn't just her she had to take care anymore but trying to go about life like it was normal was hard.

'Normal' Andy thought. Turns out normal didn't really work out for her. She had tried being normal with Sam, gave him her heart and had admitted she loved him only for it to end in tears.

Today was going to be difficult, their friend had been buried yesterday and now the 15th division would be left to pick up the pieces.

Andy walked into the locker room checking to see if Traci or Gail had arrived yet. Both had adamantly stated they would return to work today even though leave was expected for both of them.

As Andy began changing into her uniform she stopped to stare at her stomach in the mirror. It was perfectly smooth for now, in a few months a bump would become clear. She had already made an appointment with her doctor for a check up yesterday before the whole Sam situation. Deep down a hope had formed that she would have him by her side for tomorrow but that was no gone.

Strolling out of the locker room she by passed the coffee machine; her beloved beverage would have to take a back seat. Her stomach had finally caught up with the news she received from the hospital and this morning Andy became acquainted with her bathroom especially her toilet.

Parade was about to begin and Traci and Gail had beaten her to it. Taking a seat next to Traci Andy stared forward not daring herself to turn around and see his eyes.

Traci reached for Andy's hand under the table as Best started talking.

'Yesterday was a sad day for the officers of this division and the entire Toronto police department laying Detective Jerry Barber to rest' Sergeant Best addressed the room. 'He was a fine member of this division and a great friend; we give his family and friends our condolences. Today though we must respect him by going back out on the streets and doing the job he worked so hard to do.'

Everyone's eyes were filled with silent tears Gail's slowly falling down her face. Andy had visited her at the hospital and they had both talked after the attack and abduction. Andy knew behind Gail's cold exterior she blamed herself for Jerry's death; he died trying to save her. It would be a long time before Gail would feel safe and be back to her usual self.

Snapping back to reality as Best read out the assignments for the day Andy's heart sank as she realised she would be partnered with Sam.

Gazing at Dov Andy motioned for them to swap so she could be partnered with him instead. After finalizing the arrangement she made her way to her desk getting started on the day left over paperwork and then meeting Dov by Jerry's desk.

Per Traci's request both Andy and Dov said they would clean out his desk. Gathering his personal items in a box that would be given to Traci later Andy reached into the bottom drawer stopping short when her hand found a bunch of money lying there. Quickly flicking through it she estimated that it must be around thirty thousand. What would Jerry be doing with all this money?

**I'm trying to keep the story as close to the promo from 3x10 as I can just adding my own spin to it. **

**I hope you like this chapter. Thanks a lot for the reviews it nice to hear what people have to say.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Well I thought last week's episode was upsetting this week kind of continued with the depression. It was sad to lose Jerry but tonight's episode - I love Sam but he needs to pull his crap together, I knew where he was coming from but it sucks to see them break up. Let's just hope it's resolved but the end of the season. From next week's promo I never thought I would say this but good on you Luke. Anyway onto another chapter thank you for the reviews and follows it means a lot, I would like to keep updating this story regularly it all depends on what's going on in life. Enjoy :-)**

Chapter 7:

This was not how Andy thought her day would be spent; in a car with the person she didn't want to have to talk too. It was like some cruel twist of fate the money in Jerry's desk was for a case he was working on, trying to bring down two guys who sold heroine by having an inside informant.

Now here she was sitting with Nick and Sam waiting for the deal to go through and back up the guy who Andy believed had a missing brother.

Yeah it was a cruel twist of fate. Sam and she had barely spoken to each other, only making slight comments towards the case.

A few minutes ago the wire had gone down meaning something could have gone from and their informant was in danger. It was Andy decision to go inside and check it out despite Sam insistence not too.

Finally reassuring Nick she could do this and some sarcastic comments directed at Sam, Andy got out of the car walking into the office muttering a plan of what she was going to say.

'I'm just a girl looking to buy some wood palates' Andy spoke to herself walking briskly to the reception. 'Nothing weird here'

Thank god she had watched that DIY furniture program on TV last week. So in the event she would be questioned what she needed them for she could pretend it was for a base on a bed.

Loud voices could be heard from the room off of the reception as she questioned the pushy receptionist. Quickly dodging through the door and radioing for back up Andy made her way forward seeing Dale being beaten by two guys.

While drawing her gun Andy felt a presence from behind her and was then suddenly yanked by the hair backwards. Whipping her elbow around she managed to through the receptionist off of her but being quickly caught off guard she was pushed into a pile of wooden pallets sending her falling to the ground with a thud.

Fearing for the baby she was carrying Andy didn't even hear Sam come in and cuff the two men while Dale ran off only to be tackled by Nick. Trying to rise to her feet she turned only to be met by Sam who wore the same look as the last night they had spoken, a mixture between anger, hurt and also concern.

He was about to open his mouth and lecture Andy on being reckless and naïve in regards to believing Dale had a brother when he was interrupted by Nick and the rest of back up. Quickly handing the prisoners off to Dov and Chris, Sam went to talk to Andy again only to see her talking to Nick.

'Are you okay?' Nick breathed out of breath from tackling Dale.

'Yeah I'm fine' Andy replied secretly worried that the baby could have been hurt during the fall.

'Are you sure?' Nick asked again.

'I'm fine really Nick' Andy spoke again looking over his shoulder at Sam who was watching the conversation between the two.

Nick's voice all of a sudden became urgent 'Andy you're bleeding!'

Andy looked down to see blood running down the inside of her jeans. Gazing back up Andy's eyes met Sam's knowing that he heard what Nick said.

Spotting Traci make her way through the back door Andy gripped a hand on her stomach while trying to walk over to her only to become dizzy and disoriented.

The last thing Andy remembered seeing was Traci run over to her as for the second time that day Andy fell to the floor. Only this time her vision faded to black.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks for the reviews and follow I love hearing about the story. Here's the new chapter it's a little bit longer. Still upset about the McSwarek break up but we will just have to wait and watch.**

**I don't own Rookie Blue wish I did because let's face it who wouldn't?**

**Side note love the stories recently being published about Andy and Sam they're great. Enjoy :-)**

Chapter 8:

Earlier in the day before the whole Dale operation Andy had requested to speak with Frank meeting him at his office. She knew it probably wasn't the right time all things considered but working at the 15th Division could only last for a while.

When she had first become a police officer there was no other place in her opinion that she would rather work. 15th division was in her blood; her dad had worked here so it always held a special place in her heart.

Today though it just reminded her of the heartbreak Sam had caused. She knew her job couldn't last long here it would soon become clear that she was with child and though her gut told her to tell Sam, her heart wasn't ready to feel more hurt.

Meeting in Frank's office Andy could see the surprise on his face when she requested the paperwork for a transfer.

Sam and her relationship had never been a big secret, even if they tried to keep it a secret, everyone knew how much the two of them meant to each other plus after the whole Brennan fiasco it was hard to hide that the two of them had go together.

That's why it came as a big surprise for Andy to be requesting transfer paperwork. The two of them were partners in more ways than one.

Frank had tried everything to talk Andy out of it she was a good officer and part of the 15th family but nothing would work with a sigh he handed the paperwork over and watched her put it in her jacket pockets before heading out on op with Nick and Sam.

Whatever was going on Franked just hoped it was sorted out before they lost another good officer.

Andy woke to the sound of Traci calling her name. She didn't know how long she had been unconscious but the scenery had changed instead of a warehouse filled with wooden pallets and drugs lying on the table, she was now lying in a white room with Traci holding her hand.

Shudders ran through her as she realized where she was; a hospital.

'Traci?' Andy whispered.

'Oh thank god Andy you're awake' a voice to her left replied. 'Don't ever do that again I was scared I had lost you too' Traci spoke tears running down her face.

'What happened?'

'You collapsed at the scene, the doctors won't tell anyone anything only that you would wake up soon and that they would talk to you when you did' Traci said.

As if on cue a knock came from the door which opened to reveal a woman in a white coat probably her doctor.

'Traci could you leave us a minute?' Andy questioned. She was still pretty sure nobody knew about the baby and she needed to talk to the doctor on her own.

'Yeah I'll just go tell the Nick and Sam that you've woken up'

Hearing Sam's name Andy's eyes snapped to meet Traci's.

'Don't let Sam come see me'

'Are you sure Andy, its Sam?' Traci asked. She didn't know he had broken her heart outside the penny.

'I'll explain it to you later just don't let him in' Andy pleaded.

Traci left leaving Andy alone with her doctor. The doctor most than likely heard the conversation but didn't comment only looking at her chart in her hand.

'Miss McNally, I'm Doctor Green' the women greeted. 'I guess our appointment needed to be pushed up from this afternoon' she smiled.

Andy had forgotten that she had organised her first check up this afternoon. The bust had consumed most of her thoughts only now did she realise this was the doctor that she had chosen to monitor her pregnancy.

'Is the baby okay?' Andy gulped tears springing to the surface as she laid her hand on her flat stomach. Memories of the blooding she saw running down the inside of her jeans and the fall sprang to mind.

_Please say the baby's okay, please don't say I've lost it._

'The baby's fine Miss McNally, I was worried that the blood we found was your body having a miscarriage, luckily it wasn't' the doctor said.

'I suspect the bleeding came from the fall and was also triggered by stress, now I shouldn't have to tell you that stress is incredibly bad for the baby.'

'But the baby's okay it isn't hurt?' Andy whispered scared that she had hurt it.

'Its fine judging by tests we did I would say you're around 8 weeks.'

'Now it's usually a bit early to pick up a lot on the ultrasounds but I would like to do one anyway, just as a precaution and also I would like to keep an eye on you for the next couple of hours just in case' the doctor said.

Andy nodded 'I won't have to stay overnight though will I?'

Doctor Green just laughed 'No need to look so terrified, I won't be keeping you over night, a nurse will be round soon to do the ultrasound and I would book and appointment in two weeks to see if everything's okay.'

Traci's head peered round the door. Green lifted her hand and beckoned her in leaving at the same time Traci stepped into the room.

'Everything okay Andy?' Traci asked.

'Yeah I'm fine just an effect from the fall' reassured Andy.

'Hey erm Traci? Where's my jacket?'

'Oh I left it with Sam'

The relief she was feeling fell from Andy's face. In the side pocket of her jacket laid the transfer papers, which had fallen out when she had been taken to the hospital and now were held in Sam's hands.


	9. Chapter 9

**I'm so sorry this hasn't been updated sooner. Life just seems to have gotten in the way this week. Hopefully the next chapter will be updated sooner as well as the next chapter on my other story so hang on tight – it is coming. Thanks for reviews and following it is nice to hear feedback. I just watched 3x11 I'm proud of the way Andy is handling things good for her but please get back with Sam soon. Anyway enjoy **

Chapter 9:

'_Everything okay Andy?' Traci asked._

'_Yeah I'm fine just an effect from the fall' reassured Andy._

'_Hey erm Traci? Where's my jacket?'_

'_Oh I left it with Sam'_

_The relief she was feeling fell from Andy's face. In the side pocket of her jacket laid the transfer papers, which had fallen out when she had been taken to the hospital and now were held in Sam's hands._

'Whoever designed hospital gowns should be shot' Andy thought. Twice she had gotten up to go to the toilet and nearly flashed Traci. Any dislike Andy felt towards hospitals multiplied in the twenty minutes she had been laying in the gown feeling exposed to the world. Finally Andy had taken matters into her own hands and replaced the gown with her own clothes smiling in the satisfaction now that she could no longer feel a draft.

After chatting with Traci, Andy felt somewhat better knowing that her best friend was here for her. Even though she felt bad for not telling Traci her secret yet it didn't change her opinion now was not the time to let the cat out of the bag.

The panic Andy was feeling about Sam finding her transfer papers was still there in the back of her mind though. Of all the things to happen Sam had ended up with her jacket containing the very papers she was trying to hide from him.

It was simple Andy had somewhat of a plan she would stay at 15th division till things were more solid but as soon as she started to show Andy would transfer division. Sam needn't be any of the wiser; he wouldn't know that when he left Andy he left the baby as well.

Deep down her gut was telling her to tell him especially after the close call today but her heart and mind just didn't want to open itself up for more hurt.

Now wasn't the time to do pros and cons though, Traci had left in search of food and a nurse was currently setting up the ultrasound equipment talking quickly with a cheery smile on her face.

It must have been a change in shift for the nursing staff because no way would somebody be this cheerful after working six hours here.

'Okie Dokie, we are all set to go' said the young nurse named Ashley.

'Now lift your shirt up, the gels going to be a little cold but I can promise you it's worth it' Ashley spoke.

A shiver ran though Andy as the gel was place on her stomach but before she could say anything the sound of a heartbeat broke though the silence in the room.

Usually Andy tried to keep her emotions in but hearing the heartbeat of her baby brought tears to her eyes. The only thing she wished was that somebody was there to feel this moment with her. Not just somebody Sam. She wanted Sam to be holding her hand hearing and seeing what she was seeing on the screen.

Well the saying was there for a reason-speak of the devil, suddenly the door swung open to reveal Sam a hurt and furious look on his face clutching a hand full of papers. Her Transfer papers.

'What the hell is this McNally?' Sam voice travelled across the room.

When the door had swung open Andy and the nurse had turned to see who had entered the room in such an abrupt fashion. Seeing Sam standing in the doorway any panic Andy had felt earlier was insignificant to what she was feeling now; a fully fledged panic attack was beginning to take place.

'What the hell is this McNally?' Andy heard Sam say.

Scrabbling to wipe the gel off her stomach and pull her top down at the same time she looked back and forth between Sam and the monitor showing the baby hoping the connection hadn't been made to Sam.

It was too late though. The emotions he had been showing when he entered the room were heightened to the extreme when he realized what was going on in there.

'I'll just give you to a minute, Andy I'll print out the pictures and leave it on the desk next to the discharge forms everything looks healthy' Ashley shakily said leaving the room quickly while carefully shutting the door behind her.

Obviously Andy wasn't the only one that had the sense a fight was coming and it was going to be a big one.


	10. Chapter 10

**New chapter hope you like it. Thanks for the reviews it's always great to read them. I hope you enjoyed this chapter the next will kind of revolve around the details of 3x11 with some of my own twists. Looking forward to 3x12 this week's only two episodes left of season 3 what will I do without rookie blue? It nice to see shoots on the web of the film of season 4. Anyway enjoy :-)**

Chapter 10:

It was like the calm before the storm both Andy and Sam just stood there in the hospital room staring at each other, each trying to read what the other was thinking.

It was quickly broken though by Sam who had manage to swallow some of his shock and now started pacing the room like a tiger caged in.

'What the hell is this Andy? First I find transfer papers in your pocket and now I find out your pregnant!' Sam shouted causing Andy to flinch.

'I mean were you ever going to tell me? Or was that your plans just apply for a transfer and go making me none the wiser that you were carrying my baby!'

'I don't know' Andy quietly whispered causing Sam to stop his pacing and turn to look at her.

'What do you mean you don't know?' Sam yelled. 'It's a simple question were you going to tell me or not?'

'I honestly don't know, you know it's not all about you' Andy said her voice rising to meet his.

'We obviously it is about me Andy because you weren't even going to tell me you're carrying my baby' he snipped.

'What did you expect me to say Sam, Hey Sam I know you just broke up with me but I really think you should reconsider since I'm Pregnant.'

The last words cause Sam to become silent. Deep down her knew she was right.

'No I didn't think so'

'For your information I was going to tell you after Jerry's wake even had the pregnancy test in my bag but I guess plans changed' Andy spoke harshly.

'You should have told me! Do you think I'm that much of a monster? What did I ever do to deserve you not telling me?' Sam let out a frustrated breath.

Andy grabbed her bag heading to the door to find Traci and sign the discharge papers. Stepping past Sam she finally replied 'You broke my heart.'

Pulling open the door she was greeted by Traci with a curious look on her face obviously having heard raised voices.

'Is everything okay Andy?' Traci spoke.

'Everything fine Traci I'm ready to go home just got to sign the papers and then we can go.'

Peering back she saw Sam still standing frozen in the room. She signed the paper and grabbed the little envelope on top containing the ultrasound photos quickly pocketing it.

As Andy turned to walk towards the exit she suddenly heard a deep voice, 'We're going to have to talk about this sometime McNally.'

Andy kept her body facing forward willing herself not to turn around and be greeted by his deep brown eyes.

'There nothing to talk about, you're the one that walked out breaking a promise I'm simply moving on with my life' Andy said keeping her gaze on the wall in front.

'Oh there is definitely something to talk about' Sam said back.

'Maybe another time but right now I'm going home, I'll see you at work tomorrow Officer Swarek' a strong note rising at the end of her voice.

She didn't want him to find out this way in fact she was still unsure if she ever wanted Sam to have found out but right now after the day she had gone through going home was her best option.

They could fight it out tomorrow which she knew he would. Sam could be damn right stubborn when he wanted to be a trait she fell in love with but she could be stubborn too. If Sam wanted to be part of the baby's life than she would let him but right now the hurt he had caused her was overshadowing any commonsense towards the situation. It's not like there was a book on this, even the book her mum brought her that now rested in her bag at the station didn't cover the situation she found herself in.

How to ditch the loser and keep smiling while carrying his baby that's the book she needed.

Stepping through the glass doors and meeting Traci at the car a sense of dread overcame her about returning to work tomorrow. Now that Sam knew his over protectiveness would be over the top even though they weren't together she was still carrying a part of him and he protects his family.

Andy had a feeling that it was going to be a long day tomorrow.


	11. Chapter 11

**A really short chapter I had it written and left it on my laptop to add to it but then I thought it's better to get it out there a continue writing then leave it a while between updates. Finale this week who's excited? I know I am, I'll really miss Rookie Blue on Thursdays it will be ages before it come back. Mcswarek :-) **

**Enjoy this chapter thanks for the reviews they brighten my day.**

Chapter 11:

_1 month later_

Life changes when you least expect it. Andy had found that out the hard way. A month had passed; one month since Sam had broken her heart, one month since he discovered her secret that she was pregnant.

Things at the 15th Division had changed, fellow officers were gradually dealing with the shock of Detective Barbers death and partners had been switched with Andy now riding with Collins. As Andy suspected Sam was over protective of her all the time no matter how many times Andy told him it wasn't his job anymore he just didn't let up.

If anyone thought the relationship was strained after Jerry's death it was even more strained after the Dale undercover op where Andy ended up in hospital.

Both Sam and Andy rarely spoke to each other unless it was work related and all their friends had caught on about what had happened between the two of them.

As much as Andy tried to leave her personal feelings at home after being caught crying by Collins when Sam had asked for his truck keys back everyone by the end of the day knew that their relationship was over.

Surprising she had found a friend in Collins he helped her through the initial stages of being broken up by being her break up buddy. Andy didn't think it was possible that any other man would read out steps from a break up book courtesy of her mum but Collins did even down to the mantra.

'_I Andy McNally am a kick arse person and just because my relationship doesn't mean I'm a failure' they both recited._

'_Just means you're unlovable' Collins added causing Andy to crack up laughing._

After that day Andy accepted that it was time to pull her life together. It still hurt she had given Sam all of her heart and got it broken in return but it wasn't just her anymore. What she said earlier in that day to Chris was true;

'_I have the choice to either fall apart or keep moving and I choose to keep moving.'_

Although she didn't really feel that way at that point by the end of the day after laughing and speaking with Collins she did and her first step to keep moving was throwing Sam his keys as she walked by her head held high.

A month had gone by with Andy stomach starting to produce a small bump which she kept hidden underneath baggy clothes she knew the inevitable talk would come with Sam but right now three things mattered her job, her friends and the baby she was carrying.


	12. Chapter 12

**Okay first off I must apologise on not updating recently life just seemed to have gotten in the way lately. I'll try to keep it shorter between updates. So 3x13 huh? I think it took me over 4 hours to sort out how I felt about it first I was like I can't believe she just left but then I kind of understand where she's coming from I just hope they don't come back with Sam with someone else because that would just majorly piss off Mcswarek fans. On other notes from the look of things Sam seems to be becoming a detective in season 4 and looks very good looking out of uniform. Who am I kidding though he looked good in uniform too. This chapter takes place around 3x12. Enjoy, I'm going away next week for a while so I will do my best to update before I go. **

**:-) Review are welcome thanks for sticking with the story.**

Chapter 12:

Today was meant to be a typical day at the station Sam and Oliver had an assignment meaning that there would be no awkwardness between for one day and Andy was simply posted outside a football stadium.

Well typical had blown up in all their faces.

Chris had been held at gun point in their own booking room and a prisoner had been shot and died in an effort to save his cell mate and Chris.

Now Andy, Chris, Dov and Gail waited for their statements to be taken and the investigation to be conducted by SIU.

The sound of Sam's voice broke Andy out of her trance. Could this day possibly get any worse?

'Frank' Sam spoke hurrying up the stairs. 'Everyone alright? Diaz?' Oliver voiced from behind him.

'What can we do?' Sam said looking directly at Frank.

'Just leave them alone SIU is on their way' Frank replied before he was cut off by Sam.

'Frank their our responsibility'

'Not tonight' Frank calmly said back 'Just go home'.

Andy glanced over at him trying not to let her gaze linger when she saw him looking back at her. Andy could tell he was unhappy leaving, typical Sam always feeling like he was responsible for ever little screw up the happened when the rookies were involved.

She had called him out on the fact that he was always a T.O and that he could never turn it off during their relationship and it seems something's still hadn't changed, apart from the status of in a relationship.

Gail was right when she commented that it felt like they were on trial and Dov's reply had been correct they were and it certainly felt like it.

The SIU case officer eyes were just cold and calculating it was like the women held no sought of emotion towards the fact that a fellow officer could have been shot tonight. She just threw questions at all the rookies when they each entered the room one at a time.

As Andy sat replying to each question thrown her way she had to resist the instinct to place a hand on her tiny bump. It was instinct to shelter her baby from this women's judgmental look as the suspension and her connection with Officer Sam Swarek was brought up but Andy knew she would have to keep calm and not raise suspicion. This woman was looking to throw someone under a bus and any reason could lead to that person being her.

No she kept her hands by her sides no matter how much they were itching to move and recalled all the details from her last shift leaving out the bits concerning her helping Nick when he had come in intoxicated. Andy wasn't about to hang one of her friends out to try especially with how nice and supporting Nick had been previously about her break up. The officers of 15th division were a family and family stuck together.

Finally the interview ended leaving Andy to walk out the room still feeling the women's harsh eyes following her every move and called Chris to go he was the final rookie to go and he knew the most information as he was had a firsthand account of what happened.

Andy gave him a small smile as she wandered towards the locker room to change although she knew it wouldn't make a difference he was about to have an audience with the true ice queen.

All they could do was wait; wait for that phone call that could break up the band so to speak.

Stopping at Traci's desk after changes they conversed about going to the penny with Andy going off on a rant about the situation they all found themselves in. She was right here she was carrying her own baby and this prisoner is in the same shoes but carrying a gun around instead threatening to hurt people to get his own way.

'What type of person does that' Andy thought.

After arranging to meet Traci at the penny Andy began walking towards the exit only to round the corner and she Sam waiting out of his uniform.

Seriously this day just kept getting better.

Andy briefly met his eyes before looking away trying to keep walking and hopefully he would get the point and back off. Today was not the day to talk about what was happening.

'Hey' Sam said meeting her step for step.

'Hey' Andy answered raising her eyes to the ceiling. 'What are you still doing here?'

There was a brief pause before Sam spoke up again 'I just wanted to make sure your okay?'

'Right' Andy mumbled.

'Well that's not your job anymore' Andy said as she keep walking noticing that Sam had stopped following. It was true he may be carrying his baby which they had yet to have a proper conversation about but anything apart from the baby wasn't his concern anymore. Maybe she was being harsh but the hurt wasn't going away from the way he handled things.

She sought Nick out at the bar checking he was okay after his strange behaviour this morning. Hearing the story she understood briefly seeing Sam entering and coming up next to Nick she invited Sam to the rookie's usual table where her ginger beer sat ignoring the feeling of Sam's eyes on her back.

For now she would make small talk with her friends while they waited on the outcome of today pushing any other thoughts out of her mind.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hey Guy's, so I'm going away tomorrow for about 11 days but I wanted to update before I went so below is the next chapter set around 3x13. When I get back i'll continue the story from 3x13 onward with my own ideas but so far I wanted to stick as close to the show as possible but with my own twist. I did this chapter longer to make it up to you guys for the waiting you're going to have to do.**

**Enjoy :-) Reviews are welcome. Thanks for reviewing and following it make my day a bit brighter.**

Chapter 13:

This wasn't how her day was supposed to go hell this wasn't the way her life was meant to go standing there in an abandoned hotel kitchen grasping a grenade in her right hand.

She didn't have any other choice though as soon as she found Hannah all her maternal instincts rushed to the surface. The girl was innocent, she had her whole life in front of her time to gush over boys, decide what career she wanted to have and rebel against her parents but the young girls life could be over before she had chance to live. So Andy did what she hoped somebody would do for her own child; she took the bomb from her allowing the girl to have her chance at life.

The sound of loud footsteps echoed in the empty room, sudden movements could mean the choice between life and death and the person who was coming obliviously knew that.

Dov, Nick and Sam came into view as Andy turned around.

'McNally?' Sam asked.

'He went that way' Andy returned using her free hand to point in the direction she was telling.

Dov was ordered to go after the suspect as the dreaded words fell from Andy's lips 'You guys you've got to get Katie out of here clear the building.'

It was then that Andy felt Sam really look at the situation she was in.

'Collins? Collins? Any thoughts?' Sam voice rang out as Collins tried to user the young girl out of the building.

'M-57 4.5 second delay after release, do not release that in here, I'll sent ETF in' he finished as he hurried away. If it was any other situation Andy would have voiced a sarcastic comment at how he finished the sentence like she wanted to release a bomb in a hotel kitchen what was she stupid? But this time it was held back all thoughts currently revolving around the bomb she was holding.

Now all that was left was her and Sam.

'Sam you don't have to be here, Go' Andy said as he holstered him weapon and walked closer to her. He didn't have to stay he didn't owe her anything okay she was carrying his child but they had hardly spoken a word to each other than the night at the penny and relating to work.

'No' Sam replied causing Andy to look at him and he said she was stubborn.

'How many bones are in a human body?'

'Okay Andy...' Sam tried to intervene but Andy cut him off 'No, no, no do you know or not?'

'206'

'206 I thought it was more like a 150 but I guess I hadn't thought about before.' She was rambling a true McNally trait but thinking about something so insignificant was fighting the fear running though her and it worked for Katie until she got here.

'First time you held a grenade?'

'Yes...' Andy breathed out 'I mean it wasn't really a goal of mine but hey at least if it the last thing I do it's a first so'

'I wish I was more like you' Sam spoke.

'What are you..?' Andy whispered breaking off at the end.

'I wish you were in my head I wish you could read my mind' Sam returned.

'What are you talking about?' Andy asked, when Sam hesitated breathing deeply as in to some up courage to reply she threw him a look of get on with it.

'I love you Andy... I do' he said.

Of all the times he could have said it he decided this moment to be truthful about his feelings he surely only meant it because it was a life of death situation or was it because of the baby?

'Sam... .' Andy brokenly said back 'I'm holding a bomb'

Sam's own hands came around hers 'So am I.'

Moments after that everything passed in a blur she remembered asking Sam to give her some room as the ETF had guy come in and calmly spoke her through what was he was doing trying to get her not to think about it and then she was free.

That was two hours ago but it still felt like she couldn't breathe her every move was being watched by Sam who sat on the bench across from her locker.

It was silent between them both of them not commenting on the tense atmosphere between them. Sam was the first to break it.

'You were brave back there' Sam said while rubbing his hands together to get rid of some of the nervous energy he had.

'No Katie was brave'

'Andy what I said to you...' Sam began looking up at her.

'It's okay heat of the moment I get it' Andy replied taking stuff from her locker and putting it into her bag. She should have got used to this by now but the hurt had come back and all she wanted to do was go home and while taking it easy and booking a doctor's appointment to make sure the stress of today was not damaging for the baby.

'No I meant it' Sam finally finished.

A bit of hope surfaced in Andy as she turned to look at him only for it to be crushed moments later.

'It's true there are 206 bones in the human body I saw it on Grey's Anatomy'

That was it the final straw for Andy. After all that had happened all that they had gone through together he was now making a joke at this crucial point in time.

Stuffing the remaining items into her bag she grabbed it a pushed past Sam to exit the locker room and go home. She was officially done last night he had seen him playing pool with Ollie and a girl from 15th division and although she denied to her mother she was jealous of seeing them together. Andy thought to herself she had become that girl, the one her mother told her not to become. Asking for the taskforce had been a complete fail and now here she was striding away pregnant from the father of her child who made the complete mistake of making a joke after all this time.

'I'm going home'

'What come on, Mcnally' Sam shouted out causing her to wipe round and face him.

He was annoyed after what he had done he was the one annoyed.

'You don't get to do this anymore okay, I don't if you're serious, I don't care if you're joking, I don't care anymore. So just leave me alone'

'I'm not gonna leave you alone, I screwed up things got tough and I walked away, I thought I was doing the right thing' Sam matched he stride for stride.

'Do you have any idea what you put me through? you broke up with me in a parking lot and for six weeks I tried to contact you, you didn't answer one of my calls'

'Andy...I'm...'

'No Sam it's too late, I'm sorry I can't do this anymore' Sam eyes widened after her heard that leave her mouth.

'Okay you don't have to do anything, I gonna do it all, I'm gonna do everything' Sam hastily said a shaky smile going across his face.

'I'm going to show you every single day until you say yes, I'm gonna make you dinner, I'm gonna take out your garbage and I'll walk your dog'

'I don't have a dog'

'Then let's get a dog labradoodle mutt from the pound I don't care, let's bring him home and call him Boo. Boo Radley I've always loved that for a dog.

'Boo Radley' Andy sounded the name out loud. If that's what he wants to call a dog what name would he give their child?

Andy looked down it was all too much for her to go from not talking to today where he was finally putting up a fight for her lowering her head her mind went off in a thousand directions.

Sam must have seen this on Andy face 'Okay can we just start with a drink? Just a drink? Please Andy just give me a chance'

Andy shrugged her mind was weighing up how truthful he was being and was she likely to get hurt again it wasn't just her anymore she was going to be a mother priorities change.

'I'll be at the penny' Sam stated walking away leaving it up to Andy to decide.

Right now Andy wished she could drink liquor would be a god send to how she was feeling but of course she was restricted if she went to the penny tonight it was simply soft drinks.

Rounding the corner she was met by Luke.

'Can we talk?' Luke asked.

Curious to find out what he was referring to Andy followed him into his office her mind still weighing the decision to meet Sam.


End file.
